Not really, in fact I'm sure few black people will really ever have the chance to behold such a glorious specimen of human life. Made of titanium, weighing a total of 12 grams, three times your average credit card and a first month set up fee of $5,000, not to mention the chance to land on the moon, hosted by your favorite Japanese space explorers, literally, this will never be your average credit card. If you haven't guessed by now, I'm talking about the Centurion Card, also known as the Black Card.
Not even offered to 95% of America, those of whom who are already in the top 5% of the world's wealth, the black card has ridiculous statistics in America alone possessed by only a few in that select 5%.
This is the only card that can buy you happiness. I just happened to run into a blog about the black card, full of legends, maybe even myths about just what a black card can do for you. I can almost guarantee for those of you who value materialism, the minimum $250,000 annual spending requirements can buy the happiness you desire.
Just to jog around it, here are some rumored legendary moments the black card experiences:
1. The black card has a monthly newsletter, so exclusive, it doesn't even have a name
2. The largest known purchase was a jet for $30
million
3. One of the most outrageous, yet "cost to be the boss" rumors I read was child needed some sand from the Dead Sea for a religious project and the cardholder called the concierge and a motorcycle was dispatched for a handful of sand which was then couriered to London.
Internationally, cardholders receive the service of a personal concierge, which basically becomes your personal assistant when it comes to things you don't want to do for yourself, like book hotels, harass the restaurant owner into closing early for your special party, and looking into that digital camera you wanted. And, if you have a secondary cardholder i.e. spouse/mistress, they too receive all the benefits at your expense. Upon enrollment you get access to unlimited concierge, valet and no black out dates for all flights, ever, and the personal shopper at Gucci never hurt either. So guess once you go black, you never go back?
And of course imitation is suicide, which is why rival companies such as Visa and Matercard offer similar cards with no-where-near comparisons. The Matercard platinum for instance has a $99 annual fee, with a concierge and unlimited companion flights, but you don't get exclusive offers and the concierge service acts more like an operator than a personal assistant, so I've heard of course.
But then I wonder, with all this wealth and upfront imaginary money, why are there still people starving in Ethiopia, war in Iraq and not a cure for HIV or cancer. These people should just buy these people out of it, or at least enough happiness until they die miserably from something avoidable. Despite my taste for material wealth, I think I would call my concierge and schedule something on the magnitude of Oprah's fame and make all the starving children full and happy. Yes my friend, its that exclusive
Some last words:
"I went to the malls and I balled too hard
'Oh my god, is that a black card?'
I turned around and replied, why yes but I prefer the term
African American Express "
Kanye West- "Last Call"
1. Hands down, the top hype of the year was Barack Obama. Label me guilty again because even I could not resists stretching my fingers over the keyboard to spit my nickels of knowledge and opinions about him. Considered phenomenal, "lesser of the two evils," hope, change, progress and the effervescent "black cool," I would have to say just as my profile documented my life, other's profiles have done the same for them, and Obama definitely showed up for months in status updates, homepages and blogs, and even as religious and political preferences around the world.
3. Lil' Wayne, Kanye and T-Pain, but mostly Lil' Wayne, were thee top music fads of the year. Lil' Wayne became so popular, I personally feel like he just stopped trying, not that he wasn't still good but when you sell a million albums in one week, it's safe to assume that your voice is good enough. These three artists just decided they could officially do whatever the wanted musically and we would love it anyways, and as consumers, we proved them right. I would have to say that T-Pain took the initiative to introduce Lil' Wayne and Kanye to the world of auto tuning and they have officially been turned out. Now, we have the pleasure of lyrics so slurred and sloppy we have to carry around the words just in case the opportunity to sing along comes up. These three are most definitely the music fads of the year.
From the recent terrorist bombing in Mumbai to the presidential election and even those astronomical events city lights will never let us see. I'm in love again, but this time it's almost tangible. I can't really think of a clever, syntactical way to work in how much I love Annie Leibovitz, I would have to say she began my interest in photography way back when...
Although editorial and almost cliche, Leibovitz is easily my favorite photographer. She's done celebrities from the likes of Michael Jordan, Scarlet Johanson and Jack Nicholas. She's even emabarked on a series of photos that bring animated Disney movies to life using celebrities. I'm waiting to see how she does with Princess and the Frog (upcoming animated film premiering Disney's first black priness). And yes, that's Beyonce as Alice.
Will Smith has to be the movie man of the year. His movie career this year has really done him justice and I think audiences all over can look past the cheesy and soppy points the movies he stars in attempts to make and look at the role he played.
