Remember "I" before "E" Except in Budweiser

Its hot, its muggy, someone else's sweat is dripping on you, someone else just stepped on your entire foot but you quickly let this go because you didn't come here to fight. Red solo cups, beer cans, glass handles, a dark room and music loud enough to make an elderly person go blind (yes, blind), and all this wouldn't be possible if it wasn't for our well known party advocate: Mr. CH₃CH₂OH, better known as alcohol, drank, booze or whatever else you choose to call it.
From freakbacks to kickbacks to those parties the fire marshal would deem hazardous, alcohol is undeniably the number one constituent. In fact whoever said they were the life of the party obviously didn't realize they were living in the shadows of Barcardi, Popov and that one blue drink.

If there was enough to drink, its automatically considered a party. Hell, even if there weren't enough, you showed up too late or the party just happened to occur where you stayed sober all night consider it a party anyways, someone else drank all the liquor for you. And its almost guaranteed that at every party you'll be brought back to Kat Williams' "The Pimp Chronicles" with someone yelling on the sideline, "TONIGHT...WE'RE GETTIN' FUCKED UP."

And not to mention how alcohol is every drunk person's excuse. Yes, I too am guilty. After all it is thee best excuse. Its like the get-out-of-jail-free card and it didn't require a trip to boardwalk avenue with a Rodney King beating riding along side (because the police are still ready and willing). And alcohol isn't just the excuse for a couple stumbles over that same person's foot, it's the excuse for a few hook-ups (just a few), belligerency and plain disorientation. Although my need for excuses is rare, I still even find myself brushing off things that are too serious for sobriety because alcohol was involved. I even find swag and confidence rising to levels unheard of, because after all, if they just make an ass of themselves, we'll just blame it on the alcohol.

So the next time you find yourself amused by someone at a party singing all the lyrics to your song with a lisp, stutter and a suave stumble, go on and pour them some more and excuse them... they usually aren't this entertaining when sober.